Miss Darcy's Diatribe
by Arwen Elizabeth
Summary: What if it was Miss Darcy who gave her brother his Hunsford Moment? After all, even the mildest people have their limits for tolerating foolishness . . .


Miss Darcy's Diatribe

 _What if it was Miss Darcy who gave her brother his Hunsford moment?_

 **Disclaimer:** When I looked in the mirror this morning, I didn't look 239. Therefore, I am not Jane Austen. More's the pity.

* * *

"Fitzwilliam." Georgiana Darcy spoke quietly as she came to sit beside her brother in his study and attempted to look him in the eye. "Fitzwilliam, where are you?"

"I am right here, Little One, as you can see perfectly well" Darcy replied.

Georgiana smiled softly. "I see my brother, yes, but I know he is far from me. Please, why will you not confide in me as you encourage me to do with you? I know you are troubled; you have not been yourself for these two months at least; not since returning with Mr. Bingley from Hertfordshire. What could possibly have happened to leave you so lost?"

Sighing, Darcy responded, "Truly, dearest, it is nothing. Just a case of wanting something I cannot have. I will get over it soon enough."

"Something? Do you perchance mean _someone_?" Georgiana questioned.

Darcy tensed. _What could she possibly know? I am certain I have not let on about my feelings for Elizabeth. Surely no one else has told her anything._ He immediately discounted the idea of confiding in her. He, a man of seven and twenty, seeking counsel from his sixteen year old sister? Surely the idea was preposterous. Yet, having a confidante certain held a certain appeal. His cousin Fitzwilliam was absent from London, Bingley was impossible for many reasons, and there truly was no one else he was comfortable enough with to open his heart. However, pride still balked at exposing his innermost thoughts and feelings to his sister.

"Truly, Georgiana, it is nothing to concern yourself with. Why do you not favor me with a performance of the latest pieces you have mastered on your pianoforte?"

Georgiana hesitated, then stiffened her spine, tightened her lips, and positively _glared_ at her elder brother. For the first time, Darcy noticed a look of unyielding determination on her normally sweet, compliant countenance.

"Fitzwilliam Alexander George Darcy! I will not be distracted. Furthermore, I believe it is time for you to stop treating me as a child, brother! You demand compliance from me, you expect me to share confidences and keep no secrets, yet never have you trusted me enough to give me the same. Why? Just earlier today you complimented me, saying: _'Georgiana, I am truly pleased to see how mature and responsible you have become. Your poise and wisdom will serve you well. I am prodigiously proud of you.'_ Well, Fitzwilliam, for once I am going to demand something of you. Allow me to test that poise and wisdom you complimented me on. I ask that you confide in me regarding this black humor which has sat so heavily upon you of late. I ask you to tell me about Miss Elizabeth Bennet."

Darcy sat up in shock. "What . . how . . where did you hear that name, Georgiana?"

"Oh, Fitzwilliam, I am not a fool! You mentioned her in several of your long, newsy, early letters from Netherfield, and then your letters became suddenly short and bereft of any information at all beyond 'I am well. I hope you are well also. Please do not neglect your studies.' Furthermore, Mr. Bingley has also been sorrowful as he has stayed with us and I have heard him softly speaking to himself about _Miss Bennet_. But most telling of all, brother, are Miss Bingley's snide comments about that _indecorous, conniving_ Miss Eliza Bennet. However, she instantly refrains from saying anything at all about Hertfordshire when you or Mr. Bingley come around, unless it is to comment under her breath about the foolishness of men over pleasant smiles and _fine eyes._ Brother, she is extremely jealous, and only one thing would arouse such feelings in her. You have found a woman you admire, perhaps even love. And the _only_ woman I have heard both you and the Bingleys comment on is Miss Bennet. Therefore, by simple deduction, I must conclude that you are suffering from the lack of her presence and so is Mr. Bingley. So, brother, I ask again: tell me about Elizabeth Bennet."

Darcy looked at his sister in astonishment and consternation. Never had he imagined Georgiana could have found enough evidence to suspect an attachment on his part, and for her to have reasoned it out so clearly was almost incomprehensible. Why, she was still nearly a child! But then, just for a moment, she looked remarkably like a woman. When had his little one turned into this impressive creature? If she kept this up, she could become remarkable, indeed.

With a half-hearted shrug, Darcy resigned himself to explaining the situation to his sister.

"Well, Georgiana, the first thing you must understand is that Bingley is not pining for Miss _Elizabeth_ Bennet at all, but rather her elder sister Miss _Jane_ Bennet. As for Miss Elizabeth, I am afraid I incautiously complimented her to Miss Bingley, mentioning that I found pleasure in the 'fine eyes in the face of a pretty woman.' As to Miss Bennet, I daresay Bingley took great pleasure in her smiles. She is a beautiful woman, undoubtedly, but to my mind, she smiles too much. I think such constant complacency and good cheer could be rather wearing."

Georgiana smiled slightly and shook her head at her brother's attempt at redirecting her attention to Bingley. "While it is undoubtedly a relief to find out that you and Mr. Bingley are not pining after the same woman, it is really your feelings for Miss Elizabeth and your relationship with her that concern me, brother. You will not distract me so easily!"

Darcy smiled. "Well, dear one, it was worth the effort was it not? As for Miss Elizabeth Bennet, well, what can I say about her? She is perhaps not the great beauty that her sister is, but she certainly is very pretty. More significantly, she is extremely intelligent and unafraid to speak her mind. She has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, and I must admit that she caught and held my attention very quickly. Although I first looked at her without admiration, it was not long before I found her quite fascinating. Her mind is lively, her manners playful and captivating, and she is also quite devoted to her family and very affectionate. While undoubtedly a proper lady, her adherence to propriety is tempered with a generous amount of common sense, which I find quite admirable. She is a very agreeable young lady, and I must own that her wit and intelligence are quite captivating. After she spent some days at Netherfield tending to her ill sister, I realized that I was too interested in her, so I decided it was time to leave Hertfordshire to remove myself from danger. Therefore, here I am."

Georgiana looked at him in puzzlement. "Danger, Fitzwilliam? Did you suspect her of a plot to poison you or steal your fortune? Nothing you have said makes her sound like a conniving fortune hunter. Why would your admiration of her be a danger to you? Furthermore, why is Mr. Bingley moping around instead of pursuing her sister? I do not understand."

Darcy sighed. He really did not relish the prospect of explaining the realities of life or the requirements a prospective Darcy bride must possess. It would just be one more step along the inevitable path from childhood to womanhood. However, it must be done.

"Georgiana, the Bennets are not of our circle. A marriage between Bingley and Miss Bennet would be inappropriate and any attachment between myself and a woman of Miss Elizabeth's circumstances would be impossible. It would be a degradation to either Bingley or myself to be caught in such a manner. In Bingley's case, the lack of connections would not be such a problem as it would be for me, so perhaps if Miss Bennet truly loved him it would not be so very bad. However, this was not the case. Therefore, Mrs. Hurst, Miss Bingley, and I decided that no time could be spared in separating Bingley from Miss Bennet. That is why we returned when we did and why Bingley has remained in town."

Georgiana furrowed her brow in thought. "Are they not a gentleman's daughters, brother? I fail to see why it would be such a degradation."

"Well, yes, their father is a gentleman, but his estate is not very large, their mother has family in trade, and they have no dowries or connections worth mentioning. Our family expects me to make a better match than a country gentleman's daughter. Additionally, some members of the family behave most inappropriately. No Georgiana, we are better served by leaving. In truth, we are doing them a favor by allowing them to be sought by men of their own sphere."

Unfortunately for Fitzwilliam Darcy, he was still staring into the fire and did not see the clouds of anger which had been building in his beloved sister's eyes. Consequently, he failed to perceive the storm which soon broke over him in unbridled fury. Georgiana released her frustration and anger with all the power of a hurricane upon her beloved brother. When the storm broke, Darcy was so astonished he was unable to stem the waves of recrimination directed at him.

"Fitzwilliam Darcy, I am ashamed of you! Have you become so blinded by your own fortune and consequence that you cannot see beyond the end of your aristocratic nose? Can you not hear yourself? ' _They are not of our station, Georgiana.'_ Since when have you cared about that? Since when did Mr. Bingley cease being the son of a tradesman? Yes, he is wealthy and he has the education and manners of a gentleman, but you know full well he was not born to the land and an estate. Clearly, Miss Bennet is not of his station-according to our society, she is his superior! And really- ' _Miss Bennet does not love Bingley_.' How would you know? Did she tell you this? Did she come up and say: 'Oh Mr. Darcy, your friend Bingley is very amiable, and though I do not care for him a jot I will marry him for his fortune'? Or did she, perchance, behave as a proper, well-bred woman is supposed to behave rather than all these society heiresses you decry?

"And as to your other objections: some of her family do not behave appropriately? Shall I introduce you to Lady Catherine, perhaps? Surely if you had truly made her acquaintance you would not criticize others for having indecorous relations. Surely none of the Bennets could be worse than she. And what about your own sister? Did I not plan an elopement? Although you managed to thwart that plan, believe me when I say that I considered myself so in love that I would have followed through. And if Wickham had proven true and loved me for myself, I still would have wished to marry him! What does station matter if one will be condemned to matrimonial misery? Is that what you seek brother? No, do not answer that. I am not yet finished with you.

"They have no connections, you say. Well, we have connections enough, do we not? Would you prefer to marry a woman whose connections include spendthrifts seeking your fortune, immoral men whose dissolute behavior leaves families angry and heartbroken, women who publicly flirt with scandal at every moment? You know full well that these are the type of connections to be had. Perhaps not every one, but far too many are of this type. So they have relatives in trade. Did I not hear you advise a friend last week that investments in trade were becoming a necessity for gentlemen if they wish to keep their estates solvent and shore up their fortunes for difficult years? What better way to seek investments than through a family connection in trade?

"Now, what other foolish complaints did you have? Oh, yes, you said they are essentially dowerless. Do you need more money, brother? Last I heard, we do not spend anywhere near our full income. Are you looking for some vapid heiress who is accustomed to overspending her allowance? You want a wife who will be constantly coming to you to discharge her bills when her pin money has been spent? Do you truly think you need a woman with a large dowry and the expensive habits that go along with it? Since when did you become a fortune hunter just like all those you have been hunting you? Perchance you wish someone like Miss Bingley; certainly she is rather handsome and also has a handsome dowry. She also is in the habit of spending a great deal more than she ought, and is consistently applying to her brother for money. Along with that dowry seems to come an overblown sense of self-importance and a belief that she is entitled to control the lives of those around her. However, that control is only ever exerted for her own benefit. And she is certainly not an unusual woman, brother! Women like Miss Bingley are the rule in our society, not the exceptions! Do you truly wish to be married to a woman with the face, money, and connections of a Diana if she also comes with the soul of an Echidna? Is this what you truly want? Because truthfully, that is what it sounds like.

"For years I have heard you lament the sycophancy of the daughters of the ton. They simper and smile and pander to your every perceived thought or wish. Yet now you are acting that way yourself, except that you are pandering to the whims of society. I thought better of you than this, brother! Where is that independence of thought you have prided yourself on for so long? It is certainly not in evidence now. I have never heard such a faithful repetition of the foolish expectations of a shallow society. And who do you think taught me that we should not yield our principles to that same shallow society? You did! And yet now you tell me that you would sacrifice every better feeling for worldly advantage? Truly?

"As to our family having higher expectations of you, well, who are they to judge? Are they the ones who will have to live with the consequences of that decision 'til death do you part'? No! If they wish money and connections, then let them marry for them! Do not make yourself miserable attempting to satisfy everyone but yourself.

"As to your final justification of your behavior, that you will be doing them a service by allowing men of their own sphere to pursue them, well, let me point out to you what foolishness that is! They are the daughters of a gentleman, yet if you will not pursue them due to their lack of dowry, what makes you think that other gentlemen will? No, they will be sought by men _below_ their station whose only care for them will be to draw themselves a little closer to the gentry. They will be bartered off to tradesmen who seek a pretty, gentle-born wife or, failing a successful marriage, they will be forced to go into service. You claim to admire Miss Elizabeth, do you truly wish to see her forced into a life as the wife of a shop owner or made to teach the foolish offspring of whatever man chooses to hire her? Do you wish to deny her the opportunity to grow and make use of her own talents? You know full well that the life of a governess or companion is not always an easy or safe one. You say you are doing her a favor; no brother, you are making excuses as you try to justify your own sense of superiority.

"Truly, Fitzwilliam, I have never before seen you betray such arrogance, such conceit, such a . . . a selfish disdain for the feelings of others as I have seen this night. Is this who you truly are? If so, why have I never seen it before? No, my brother, I wish you would take a very close look at yourself tonight. If this is what you have chosen to become, what sort of man you desire to be, then I am . . . I am . . . _most seriously displeased!_ "

With that final volley of words ringing in the room, Georgiana Darcy spun on her heel and fled the study of Darcy House in a flurry of muslin and tears, leaving her battered brother behind.

* * *

Darcy sat back in his comfortable leather chair, stunned into silence and immobility. What had come over his sister? Never had he seen such a display of temper! Yet even in the midst of his shock, humiliation, and indignation over the treatment he had been subjected to, he could not help but realize that he had never seen his sister so magnificent as she had been in her fury. Could there possibly be merit in her arguments? Could he have been so wrong?

 _Could he pursue Miss Elizabeth Bennet?_

As he sat and thought, he swiftly came the mortifying awareness that _she was right._ He had been a selfish being all his life. Although he had been given good principles, he had been left to follow them in pride and conceit. His parents, although good themselves, had allowed, encouraged, almost taught him to be selfish and overbearing; to care for none beyond his own family circle; to think meanly of all the rest of the world; to _wish_ at least to think meanly of their sense and worth compared to his own. How had he lived for nearly eight and twenty years without realizing this? What a debt he owed to his beloved sister! By her, he was properly humbled. Never before had he doubted whether his opinions were right. Never had he doubted _himself_ before. When had he become this arrogant and conceited man? Her reproofs must be attended to.

He could do it. It was not impossible to correct his temper. Surely he could learn to bring his behavior into alignment with his principles. He knew that, in essentials, he was a good man. Now he simply had to bring his true character to the surface, to be the man he was meant to be. Tonight he would start with Georgiana, to thank her for her correction and show her, by every civility in his power, that he was not so mean as to resent the past. On the morrow, he would call upon Bingley and confess his part in separating his friend from Miss Bennet.

Once his reformation was complete, perhaps, just perhaps, he and Bingley should return to Netherfield after all.

* * *

 **AN** : This is the first thing I've written in many years. Hopefully it can provide a few minutes of fun for others besides me!


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